My Parents Live Alone in Sri Lanka.
What Are My Options?
If you are reading this at an odd hour after a phone call that did not sit right, start here. Six options, including the ones that cost nothing and the ones that do not involve us — with what each actually costs and who each genuinely suits.
Doing nothing is on the list
Sometimes it is the right answer
Before you decide anything
First, Work Out Whether This Is Actually Urgent.
Living alone is not the problem. Nobody knowing quickly if something changes is the problem. Those are different questions with different answers.
Probably not urgent yet
- They still cook, and describe the meal without prompting
- Calls run their usual length and cover normal ground
- Neighbours, temple or friends come up in conversation
- Medication is described specifically, not vaguely
- They mention going out, not just being at home
- Nothing has changed in the past six months
Worth acting on now
- A fall, dizzy spell or hospital visit mentioned late
- The same story arriving twice in one conversation
- Meals described as “something” or skipped entirely
- The phone handed over quickly to end the call
- Bills, appointments or post visibly slipping
- Any change that has happened in the past few months
One item from the right-hand column is not a decision. Three or four together usually means your parents have shifted from living to managing, and that is the point at which the options below are worth reading properly.
The realistic list
Six Options for Parents Living Alone in Sri Lanka.
Including the two that cost nothing, and the one where we tell you to weigh our own recommendation carefully.
Do nothing, for now
FreeSuits: Parents who are genuinely managing and would resent help arriving early.
A legitimate answer, and often the right one. The risk is that nobody would know quickly if something changed, so pair it with a standing arrangement for someone to call weekly.
Lean on family or neighbours
Free, sociallySuits: Families with a relative genuinely nearby and willing.
Works well while it works. It has no backup and no accountability, and it tends to lapse quietly rather than end formally. Do not let it be the only plan for years.
Hire someone privately
Lowest paid optionSuits: Families with a trusted relative in Sri Lanka who can supervise properly.
Cheaper per day, and you take on the vetting, the payroll and the cover when they do not turn up. From overseas that is a real burden, not a theoretical one.
Use a home care agency
Membership plus a daily rateSuits: Most families arranging care from abroad with nobody local to supervise.
Costs more than a private hire and takes on the employment, replacement and reporting. This is what we do, so weigh the recommendation accordingly.
Bring them to live with you
Highest, by a wide marginSuits: Families whose parents genuinely want to move, and who can absorb the visa and living costs.
Visa queues are long and contributory routes are expensive. Many parents also decline, and those who come sometimes find long days alone in an unfamiliar country lonelier than home.
Residential care in Sri Lanka
Comparable to daily home careSuits: Advanced dementia, or needs beyond what a home setting can safely manage.
A bigger step than most situations require. For similar money, home care usually keeps them in a house they know, which matters more than families expect.
What Families Actually End Up Choosing.
Most arrive having already tried the informal options. A cousin was checking in, a neighbour was keeping an eye out, and it worked for a year or two before quietly stopping. Very few families start by looking for an agency.
Of those who do arrange paid care, the large majority start small — two or three companion visits a week rather than daily support. It is the cheapest thing that changes anything, and crucially it is the easiest for a parent to say yes to, because company is not an admission of decline.
Hours then extend when something specific prompts it: a fall, a diagnosis, a discharge. Almost nobody moves from nothing to full-time care in one step, and the families who try usually meet a flat refusal.
Relocation gets considered far more often than it gets done. Between the visa cost, the waiting period, and a parent who frequently does not want to leave, most households abandon the idea after one honest conversation rather than after an application.
And a genuine minority conclude their parents are fine and do nothing further. We would rather tell you that after an assessment than sell you hours nobody needs.
Money, honestly
What the Options Actually Cost.
We can be precise about our own rates and only directional about everybody else's, so treat the comparison accordingly.
Two of the six options cost nothing in money. Doing nothing and leaning on family are free, and they are free because somebody else is absorbing the risk — usually a relative who has not been asked whether they mind.
Among the paid options, the ordering rarely surprises anyone. A private hire is cheapest per day. An agency costs more, and the difference buys vetting, payroll, replacement and written reporting. Residential care in Sri Lanka lands broadly in the same territory as daily home care, which is why so few families choose it once they compare properly.
Relocation is in a different bracket entirely. Contributory parent visas carry substantial per-parent charges before you count housing, health cover and living costs in an expensive city. Families who price it properly usually find that years of daily home care in Sri Lanka costs less than the visa alone.
Worth setting against all of it: the flights. Two return trips a year to check on your parents in person costs more than several months of companion care. Keep taking the trips — they matter for reasons care cannot replace — but they are not a substitute for somebody being in the house on an ordinary Tuesday.
Because Sri Lankan rates are set against Sri Lankan wages, the numbers usually land lower than families expect. That is the single most common reaction we get on a first call, and it is why the rates below are published rather than quoted after a consultation.
What to Do If Your Parents Say No.
A refusal is the normal first answer, not the end of the discussion.
Accept it, and do not argue the point on that call. Pushing hardens the position, and a parent who has said no under pressure now has to defend it. Very little is lost by leaving it a few weeks.
In the meantime, do the assessment anyway if they will allow a visit. It costs nothing, it is not a commitment, and it converts your worry into a written account of what somebody actually observed. Plenty of parents who refuse care will agree to somebody simply coming to look.
Reduce what you are asking for. Most refusals are aimed at the version in your parent's head — a stranger in the house every day, watching them. Two hours of company on a Tuesday afternoon is a different proposition, and it is often accepted after the same person declined “a carer”.
Let somebody else raise it if you can. A sibling, a cousin in Colombo, or their own doctor will sometimes land it where you cannot, simply because it does not arrive from the child they are trying not to burden.
And expect them to change their mind. A great many families come back within a few months, usually after something small and unignorable. Having the assessment already done means you are not starting from nothing on the day it stops being optional.
One thing not to do is go behind their back and arrange care as a surprise. It almost always ends with the caregiver being sent away on the first morning, and it makes the second attempt considerably harder than the first. Whatever you arrange, your parents should have agreed to it, even reluctantly.
What paid care costs
Membership first, then simple daily rates.
If you land on home care, these are the published rates. One annual membership covers coordination, payroll and unlimited caregiver replacements, then a flat daily rate for the level of support your parents actually need.
BetterHands Annual Membership
LKR 20,000
One-time annual registration fee
- Unlimited caregiver replacements at no additional cost if you are not satisfied
- Payroll management and caregiver administration
- Ongoing coordination and support from the BetterHands team
- Access to all services covered under the BetterHands membership
Step two — daily service rates
Duties below are what each role normally provides — your care plan is tailored during the free assessment.
Caregiver
Daily living support and companionship
LKR 4,500/day
Most families start here — a parent who is managing, but should not be alone all day.
- Friendly conversation and companionship
- Bathing and personal care assistance (if required)
- Medication reminders and general supervision
- Simple meals and refreshments
- Short walks and light activities (if appropriate)
- Day-to-day assistance and emotional support
Nursing Assistant
Personal care plus basic clinical support
LKR 6,000/day
Common where diabetes, blood pressure or early-stage dementia needs daily monitoring.
- Everything in the caregiver role
- Vital signs monitoring (BP, blood sugar, SpO₂)
- Medication reminders and administration support
- Basic wound and continence care
Professional Nurse
Complex medical and post-operative needs
LKR 9,000/day
Usually after a hospital discharge, a stroke, or where wounds and IV care are involved.
- Everything in the nursing assistant role
- PHSRC-registered clinical nursing
- Wound care, injections, and IV therapy
- Catheter, NG tube, and post-operative care
Daily rates are charged in addition to the one-time annual registration fee of LKR 20,000. The same daily rates apply to day care, night care, live-in, and hospital bystander support — no shift premiums, no travel supplements for any district. A free care assessment is provided before any commitment.
A one-way transfer for the caregiver is arranged at the start of placement.
Families we look after
Trusted with the people who raised us.
“BetterHands transformed my mother's quality of life. The caregivers are professional, compassionate, and treat her with so much dignity. Our whole family is relieved and grateful.”
Chamari W.
Colombo 07
“After my father's heart surgery at Lanka Hospitals, the nursing team from BetterHands provided exceptional post-operative care at home. They were thorough, kind, and always on time.”
Roshan & Dilini P.
Nugegoda
“My grandfather was very lonely after being discharged from hospital. His BetterHands companion has become a true friend — he is happier and more engaged than he's been in years.”
Priya N.
Kandy
Common questions
Questions Families Ask When Parents Live Alone.
Look for a pattern rather than a single event. Shorter phone calls, repeated stories, vague answers about meals, a fall mentioned weeks late, and visitors no longer coming up in conversation. Any one of those is nothing. Three or four together usually means they are managing rather than living.
No. Plenty of people in their eighties live alone perfectly well and would be diminished by help arriving too early. The question is not whether they are alone, it is whether anyone would know quickly if something went wrong.
Sometimes, but it works less often than families expect. Visa costs and waiting times are substantial, and a parent spending long days alone in an unfamiliar country while everyone works is frequently lonelier than they were at home.
Residential care exists and suits some situations, particularly advanced dementia or intensive nursing needs. For most people it is a bigger step than required, and home care at Sri Lankan rates is often comparable in cost while keeping them in their own house.
It works until it does not, and it rarely announces when it stops. Relatives get jobs and have their own families. The arrangement has no backup, no accountability, and you usually find out it has lapsed some time after it did.
Two or three companion visits a week. It is the lowest-cost arrangement that puts a named, accountable person in the house on a schedule, and it is the easiest for a parent to accept because it arrives as company rather than care.
BetterHands nurses are registered with Sri Lanka's Private Health Services Regulatory Council. Entitlements in your own country should be confirmed with the relevant authority, as individual circumstances vary.
Check it yourself
Sources and further reading
Entitlements and health guidance change. These are the official sources — go to them rather than taking our word for it.
You are allowed to just find out.
Nothing on this page requires a decision. The most common thing families get wrong is waiting until something forces one, because a choice made after a fall is a worse choice than the same one made in February.
A free assessment is somebody visiting your parents, looking at the house, reading the medication list, and writing down what they found. It commits you to nothing and it answers the question you have actually been asking, which is whether you should be worried.
Sometimes the answer is no. That is a genuinely useful outcome, and we would rather deliver it than a care plan nobody needs.
If it helps, treat it as gathering information rather than arranging care. You are not committing your parents to anything by finding out how they are actually managing, and you are not betraying their independence by asking. Most families who assumed the worst discover a picture somewhere in between, which is easier to act on than a suspicion.
Start by finding out.
Decide afterwards.
A 15-minute call, scheduled for your hours rather than ours. We will tell you honestly what your parents need — including if that turns out to be nothing.
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